Sea Lions Barking At Waves

"But you know people get all emotional and sometimes, man, they just don't act rational, they think they're just on TV"--Lou Reed

I've never considered myself to be much of a conspiracy buff. In fact, I can only think of one conspiracy theory that I've ever attached much merit. I've never been able to buy the idea that Lee Harvey Oswald acted alone in the assassination of John F. Kennedy. My disbelief in that notion has less to do with any one particular theory, but more to do with the fact that Oswald was considered to be a poor rifleman by the US military. The idea that a guy who was a shitty shot could be so accurate from a considerable distance with a crap rifle just strains credibility. However, if I were presented with empirical data that would prove otherwise, I would accept the fact and move on. Which brings me to "Birthers."

Birthers are people who believe---in the face of all contrary evidence---that Barack Obama was not born in the United States, and therefore is not the legitimate president of our country.

I first became aware of birthers during the presidential campaign last year, but I, like most sane people, never took them seriously. However, after seeing how Delaware Republican house member Mike Castle was treated (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9V1nmn2zRMc&feature=player_embedded) at a recent speaking engagement, I've begun to think otherwise. Castle, a noted sensible moderate, was discussing the issues of the day when he began to take questions from the audience. He then called on a particularly hysterical woman, who began shouting about Obama being a "citizen of Kenya" and lacking a genuine birth certificate. When Castle replied back that he believed the President to be a genuine American citizen, all hell broke loose. You would have thought he advocated the dismemberment of rowdy children, or the drowning of puppies. He was shouted down by his own constituency to such a degree that he couldn't be heard over the din despite his microphone. That's when I realized that these people aren't just stupid, they're dangerous.

This is how people get assassinated. You question their legitimacy often enough and you create the very real danger that some nut job, filled with a sense of righteousness, decides to take things into his own hands.

Even worse are the people of status in this country who would lend credence to this nonsense. I'm not just talking about media types like Lou Dobbs and Rush Limbaugh (although that's bad enough), but even worse are the elected officials who state that they aren't sure about Obama's birthright. These ass clowns include Republican congressman John Campbell of California, Republican US Senator Saxby Chambliss of Georgia, and Dick Cheney's daughter, Liz.

While they won't come right out and say that Obama's citizenship is illegitimate, they will intimate uncertainty. They do this not because they don't know better (they do), but because they want to keep the issue going. They somehow think that keeping alive the torch and pitchfork crowd's lunacy is beneficial to their party. To be fair, there are prominent Republican politicians and media members who are willing to call bullshit, well, bullshit. John McCain has repudiated the very suggestion of illegitimate citizenship and MSNBC's Joe Scarborough (former Republican house member of Florida) said this about Birthers-"They would rather be like sea lions barking at waves," he said. "Instead of trying to figure out what's happening to their country ... they embrace conspiracy theories, and they make themselves look like cartoon characters."

During the campaign last year, many on the radical right put forth the idea that Obama was a "Manchurian Candidate." If you're not familiar with that term then I'll explain. The Manchurian Candidate is a classic piece of paranoid cinema from 1962 starring Frank Sinatra (later remade to lesser effect with Denzel Washington in the lead circa 2004). The basic plot is that of a politician who, as an American soldier serving in the Korean war, was captured by communists, tortured by the Chinese, and brainwashed into becoming a political assassin. Here's the funny thing, there was a candidate for president who was captured by communists and tortured by Asians in the 2008 election. His name is John McCain. In fact, there was even a candidate for president who wasn't born in the United States. Also John McCain. McCain was born in the Panama Canal on a military base in 1936. Do I or any other rational human being think that John McCain was an illegitimate contender for the presidency or worse? Of course not.

One has to wonder how this nonsensical theory can persist. Well, I think I have an idea. There is a large, vocal minority in this country who think that time is passing them by. They tend to be middle aged and older, white, and reside in rural areas. They have great difficulty accepting that a man of color with a funny name and "socialist" ideas could be supported at the ballot box by 53% of the country. In other words, racists. Now, I'm not saying that all rural white people of a certain age are racists, but if you're a Birther, then you're probably in that demographic. And you're definitely a racist, or at least a fricking loon.

Sumo-Pop
July 25, 2009

Not that it will matter to some, but here's a link to Obama's birth certificate. Please note that Hawaii was then, and still is, a state. http://latimesblogs.latimes.com/.shared/image.html?/photos/uncategorized/2008/06/13/bobirthcertificate.jpg